Good luck!
Thursday, 17 January 2013
Wednesday, 28 November 2012
Stupid directions on products
Stupid
Directions. How dumb do they think we are???
On a bag of Fritos: "You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside." (The shoplifter special??)
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestions: Defrost."
On the bottom of the box of Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: "Do not turn upside down."
On Marks and Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating." (No!!!!)
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (No surprises there)
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (like what?)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: Contains nuts." (Really!?!)
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly".
On a Swedish chain saw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals".
On a container of salt: "WARNING! High in Sodium"
On a blanket from Taiwan: "Not to be used as protection from a Tornado"
On a Taiwanese shampoo: "Use repeatedly for severe damage"
On a pushchair: "Remove child before folding".
On a packet of condoms: "Do not drive whilst using this product"
On a bottle of bathroom cleaner: "For best results start with a clean bathtub before use"
On a Korean kitchen knife: "Please keep out of children"
A letter from Wallmart
Assignment:
Read the letter below. What is your opinion? Pick 3 things that you think is most funny and tell your fellow student what it is about and why you think this is funny.
Mr. and Mrs. Fenton are retired, and Mrs.
Fenton insists her husband go with her to Wal-Mart. He gets so bored with all
the shopping trips. He prefers to get in and get out, but Mrs. Fenton loves to
browse. One day Mrs. Fenton gets this letter from Wal-Mart:
____________________________________________________________________________________
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30 October 2012
Dear Mrs. Fenton,
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.
Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this behaviour and may ban both of you from our stores. We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. All complaints against Mr. Fenton are listed below.
Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse was shopping in Wal-Mart:
1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.
2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.
3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on
the floor leading to the ladies rest rooms.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in house wares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, 'Code 3' in house wares..... and watched what happened.
5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.
6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET
FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
And last, but not least .
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.
8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'
9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.
10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.
11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.
12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.
13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"
14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"
And last, but not least .
15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
We therefore ask you and your husband to stop visiting our supermarket.
Yours faithfully
Store Manager WalMart, Orlando Florida
__________________________________________________________________________________
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A special letter
Take a look at this:
Barack Obama’s personal letter to a girl with two dads
A touching letter from a ten-year-old girl to Barack Obama and the US President’s heartfelt reply is spreading around the world.
Ten-year-old Sophia Bailey-Klugh hand wrote a letter to the American president which included a drawing of her two dads kissing.
She told him she was inspired by him and was so glad that he agrees that two men can love each other.
Sophia also asked for advice from Obama about getting teased at school for having two dads because it hurts her heart.
In the hectic final days before the US election, President Obama wrote a letter back to Sophia, telling her that he was inspired by her, that she was lucky to have two parents who care for her and they were lucky to have an “exceptional daughter”.
“In America, no two families look the same. We celebrate this diversity. And we recognize that whether you have two dads or one mom, what matters above all is the love we show one another,” Obama wrote.
Sophia's dads - Jonathan Bailey and Triton Klugh - put the letters on Facebook saying: "Totally unprompted, our amazing 10 year-old decided to write this letter to Barack Obama, and it made (us) so unbelievably proud. And maybe we teared up a little."
from: www.novafm.com
Friendship literally moves you!
Of course Coca-cola is great brand which is good at spreading a positive feeling.
This is a great example of how friends work together and have fun doing this!
Take a look at the add below and try to figure out what it is about.
First enlarge this add and read it.
Beantwoord de volgende vragen:
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1) Wat is er speciaal aan "The Friendship Machine"?
2) Beschrijf in 4 stappen wat je moet doen om "The Friendship Machine" op de juiste manier te gebruiken.
3) Wat zijn de resultaten van "The Friendship Machine"?
4) Kijk nu het filmpje. Klopt het met wat je uit de onderstaande advertentie haalde?
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Take a look at this video:
Lost generation?
This video makes you think about life. Try and read all of this while you listen to the text. Can you tell me what this person is trying to tell you?
Try to answer the following questions:
1) In the beginning this person is positive / negative * about her generation.
(*Cross out the wrong answer)
2) When you come to the end of her text, she reverses it. What does reverse mean?
3) This person uses some difficult words. Pauze the video when you see difficult words. Write them down and look up the meaning of the words.
4) Now that you've seen the whole video. What is her look on he future?
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